Political parties as professions
This is just a bit of fun I was having on Twitter with the election campaign on and thought I would turn into a blog post - imagining what our political parties would be if they had to get up every
morning and go to work [h/t Sasha Hunter for that last thought].
The Tories: South West London estate agent
Well-scrubbed, suited and booted, posh or ‘aspirational’
or both, originally from the Home Counties, keen to ‘make it in the property
market’. Says ‘Yah’ a lot.
Labour: Local authority 'equalities' officer
Well-meaning, but tangled up in convoluted ideology and bureaucracy; nevertheless convinced that more convoluted ideology and bureaucracy is the way forward; partly lost sense of itself but still packs plenty of political clout.
UKIP: Builder
No-nonsense at best, uncouth and bigoted at worst; unreliable,
‘likes a drink’, resentful at all these Eastern European builders coming in and
doing a better job for less money.
The Lib Dems: Lawyer (EU level)
Internationalist; in love with the European Union and
making a good living off it, flitting between Brussels, Luxembourg and London. Generally
competent and decent, but tends to over-estimate its worthiness; like any good
lawyer, will take the view of whoever does the hiring [h/t Kathie Clark for that thought].
The Greens: Student or full-time activist
Nice but young and gullible; head full of theory and self-righteousness,
but not done much questioning yet. Hasn’t had a job in ‘the real world’; trustafarian
or at least from a wealthy family; total devotion to saving the world, but won’t
stray far from fellow travellers.
For more on not-dissimilar topics, see The Labour Party and other party politics page.
Idly wonders if the SNP would be an evangelical preacher...
ReplyDeleteI note only one of them actually produces anything tangible. Three of them argue about who should have what and one is a middleman who pisses everyone off.
ReplyDelete